


To Court a Geek

by Satella



Series: Barry and Len Kissing (and Other Good Things™) [2]
Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Developing Relationship, F/M, Fluff, M/M, Pre-Relationship, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, barry is also a cat lover, but mostly just cisco, cisco is a cat dad, forcefully, lisa is like a cat who leaves dead birds, lisa is sneaky and likes to break in, many people are victims to the Snart Siblings B&E Abilities™ these are the victims and their stories, meaning she leaves gifts for cisco, she's courting him, wanda the cat is pretty chill, you will need a dentist
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-22
Updated: 2018-02-22
Packaged: 2019-03-22 15:45:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13767327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Satella/pseuds/Satella
Summary: Lisa always got what she wanted, except Cisco. She was always nervous about approaching him after everything that happened with her brother and the bomb in her neck. Finally, she grew some courage and began attempting to Court a Geek, in the form of wooing (and hopefully wining and dining) one Cisco Ramon.After several weeks of Lisa breaking into his and Barry's apartment, Cisco comes to a decision. Hopefully he won't get iced.Less likely though.





	To Court a Geek

Cisco couldn’t really explain why he did it, but he did. He finally gave her a chance, and he definitely did not regret it. If you ask him, his response would more than likely be that he only gave in so she would get it out of her system and would finally leave him alone. But honestly? He was thrilled about her showing such an interest in him. Obviously, no one could know that, as he worked closely with the CCPD and he was best friends with Cenral’s leading hero.

But Barry couldn’t really blame him if he found out about his date with Sister Cold this evening. Cisco knew about Barry’s harbored crush on one Leonard Snart. Actually, wait a minute. Barry was the one who shoved him into it this with his eyes wide open. He distinctly remembered Barry telling him that he would “regret not doing this” as he forced Cisco to write that note to Lisa.

* * *

 

At least Lisa was less (more) of a threat than her brother, having been lucky enough to have no criminal record. Was it because she was mostly innocent? Definitely not. But her older brother was looking out for her and would more than not take the fall for her to keep her out of trouble. If you asked Cisco, he would say that’s probably why he even had semi-recent arrests, as there was no possible way Cold could have that many issues but now suddenly steal the Hope Diamond perfectly without any proof… The older man would never admit it, but he was fiercely protective of his baby sister and would do anything to keep her out of the spotlight, even if that meant tangling himself up with Barry (like he wouldn’t want to do that, come on) and the CCPD.

She was trained and loved by the best. Sure, Mick had… Interesting ways of getting things done, but between him and Len, she was in good (terrifying) hands.

Had she not fumbled up her first few jobs, neither Snart would (likely) have any record once they hit their twenties. Mick… Not so much.

But that’s not important.

What is important is what to wear?!

Lisa had spent the last two months attempting (and succeeding) to woo Cisco. Now, he had to do something to woo her. Or else his dick was probably going to get frozen. Until it shatters.

His blood ran cold at the thought of Snart actually following through with his threat. No matter how much the older man swooned over Barry, there is no way the Flash can protect Cisco if he accidentally upsets Lisa.

Oh fuck. Why did he have to ask her out?

Oh yeah, that's right.

You know how cats will typically go hunting and bring something back to their owner? They drop it on the doorstep, wait for the door to open, and look up at you with the biggest eyes they can, itching and wanting your love and attention for doing something so meaningful.

At least, that’s how Cisco’s cat is when she catches mice in his and Barry’s apartment. He normally walks in, plops down on the couch waiting for her to show up, and almost always will scream when he feels a small thud on his lap and is met by the lifeless corpse of whatever mouse was unlucky enough to scurry past Wanda. And no matter how much he wanted to yell at her and be angry, he couldn’t find it in himself to raise his voice. Not after looking at her face. She always looked so proud and happy, like she was providing for her children and she just wanted praise for her good deeds.

That’s also pretty much what Lisa would do.

* * *

 

It started out with Cisco returning to his and Barry’s apartment one day, trudging up the steps and flinging the door open, frustration seeping through his pores at today’s latest botched attempt at upgrading Barry’s thermal tech for the Flash suit. Nothing was going according to plan and he may or may not have singed the tips of his fingers multiple times when he kept fucking up the wiring.

Just as he was about to sit on his couch so he could throw himself into whatever Sam and Dean were hunting this week, he noticed a medium sized black gift box with a sparkling gold ribbon wrapped nicely around it.

An envelope was sitting atop the box, Cisco’s name written in a beautiful cursive script on the front of it. Shrugging his shoulders and letting his curiosity get the best of him, he leaned forward and snatched up the note and the box, placing them in his lap.

This definitely wasn’t Barry’s messy scrawl. Or Caitlin’s meticulously neat handwriting. This looked to be done with a fountain pen (or dip) and some fancy type of nib. Scratching his head, he couldn’t recall any important dates coming up. He had at least two more months until his birthday, Christmas wasn’t for several months, and no other holidays were nearby. Well, none that would warrant a gift.

Oh well, here goes.

Turning it over, he noticed a golden wax seal matching the same shade of ribbon on the box. The seal was of a beautiful “S” with glitter coating the top of it.

Whose name started with an S?…

He gently crept the wax back, attempting to keep it as intact as possible and finally managed to break the seal, slipping the thick card out of its casing.

 

_Cisco,_

_I know that you weren’t able to make it out of town for Chicago Comic Con this year because we kept you incredibly busy. One of your adorable friends may or may not have clued me in on which issues you are missing for a few of your collections. Most of which I know someone with your Civil Servant’s salary could never afford.._

_So I took the liberty of treating my favorite nerd._

_Stay golden, Cisco._

_~Lisa_

_xoxo_

 

Cisco’s blood ran cold (pun not intended). Lisa Snart had been in his apartment. She had been near his couch. She had talked to one of his friends! Oh no! Is Barry okay?

Is Wanda okay?!

He dropped the box and card onto the table and went in search of his cat who was his pride and joy. He frantically called for her as he ran from room to room, finally finding her wrapped around herself, lounging on Barry’s bed.

His heart rate returned to a normal pace.

His baby girl was definitely okay.

Slowly, he made his way back to the couch, trying to decide if the box was worth opening or not.

In all honesty, she wasn’t likely to kill Cisco. Cisco was well aware of Leonard Snart’s feelings for his best friend and roommate. And that meant if Cisco knew, Lisa had to know. He was also almost positive she knew Barry’s identity. No matter how villainous they were, Cisco knew Barry would never forgive Snart if something happened to Cisco, so Lisa probably wasn’t out for blood. Probably.

He also did help to save her life.

And she may or may not have given him a pretty sweet ass kiss.

But it’s not like it mattered.

Or anyone knows about it…

 

He finally took the plunge.

 

Gingerly, he eased the ribbon off the box and slid the lid off, leaning back as far as he could in case it was a trap. When nothing exploded in his face, he cracked an eye open and fell off the couch at the sight in front of him.

Inside the box was a stack of C.B.C. graded comic books, all a minimum of 9.0.

That’s not what freaked him out so much.

At the top of the stack was Action Books #1, first appearance of Super Guy. Followed immediately by Investigator Comics #27, first appearance of the Dark Night. There was even Showstopper #8, first appearance of Sergeant Frostbite (who may or may not have been Leonard Snart’s inspiration and lifetime aspiration). He had ten graded comics, whose total value would be well over four million dollars.

This was easily the most expensive box of anything that has sat in Cisco’s lap. And he worked in S.T.A.R. Labs and helped to build the particle accelerator (of doom…) and worked with expensive equipment on a daily basis.

He nearly shit himself as he quickly snatched up the box of items and ran to his room, easing his phone out of his pocket and dialing his best friend.

 

* * *

 

 

Barry rushed home as soon as he could, wondering what was bothering Cisco and hoping to make sure he was okay.

“Cisco, I’m here! Are you okay?!” he called out as he leaned over and eased his shoes off by the door, grinning slightly as Wanda darted toward him and walked in circles around his feet. He scooped her up into his arms and walked down the hall to where he saw Cisco’s light on and his door wide open. The cat in his arms began purring contently as Barry scratched her behind the ear, anxiety beginning to pool in his stomach as he was met with silence.

When he entered Cisco’s room, the man was standing near the door, looking down into a box on his desk, seemingly caught in a trance, but unscathed nonetheless. He slowly approached his friend, placing a light hand on his shoulder and shaking him.

“Cisco, are you okay, man? You’re freaking me out!”

His brown eyes immediately snapped up from their fixed point on the box, shock flooding them at their core.

He didn’t speak, merely pointed at what he was originally looking at.

Barry’s eyes flicked down and he had to do a double take, genuinely believing his eyes were deceiving him.

“Is that what I think it is?” he asked, throat going dry as he tightened his grip on the cat in his arms, not knowing what to do with his hands, nor how to feel about seeing a box of nearly priceless comic books sitting on the desk.

Cisco just nodded.

“What the actual fuck?! Lisa really got them?!”

 

* * *

 

It took Cisco nearly a week to shake off the surprise of the gift Lisa had left him. When all sense finally made it back to him, he made sure to get everything arranged so he could have his new comics insured and set out to build the perfect display case for them that had maximum security but allowed them to be perused and prevent any light damaging from penetrating the currently reflective ink of the vivid covers.

Where the hell did she get most of these? Very few were in circulation and would never be found at a Comic Convention. They were far too valuable.

His head had been reeling for days.

It also took him nearly a week to get the courage up to call the thief, gulping as he dialed the number that sat dormant in his phone for the last two years, half hoping she had a new number and half not so he could hear that smooth voice whispering in his ear.

An audible click was heard, then Cisco was met with that silk that sent shivers down his spine.

“Hello, Cisco. I assume you got your gift?” she asked, half cocky, half unsure, feeling slightly uncomfortable under her false bravado.

“I-yes-Lisa, thank you. I’m not really sure I have the words… I’m still speechless which is kind of an impossibility for me. There is no way I could possibly pay you back for all of this...” he said, glancing at the comics displayed proudly in his and Barry’s living room, genuinely hoping she purchased them and didn’t steal them.

“Oh, don’t worry about that, Cisco. I didn’t do this because I want you to pay me back. I’m doing this because I want to court you.”

She was basically purring into his ears.

About courting him.

Lisa Snart wanted to court him.

Sister Cold wanted to date him???

 

“Excuse me?” he asked, finally finding his voice and feeling incredibly uncomfortable.

“Don’t worry about it, cutie. Be seeing you, Cisco.”

“Wait!” he blurted out before she could cut the line.

“Yes, dear?”

A beat of silence.

“Did you buy them?”

Another beat of silence.

“Yes.”

And with that, she hung up the phone, leaving Cisco to stew in a pot of confusion. And slight arousal. And maybe a hint of relief. But mostly confusion.

“What the fuck is going on in my life?”

He groaned and threw himself onto the couch.

 

* * *

 

 

About three days later he came home to a similar scene, only this time, there was some fresh cream sitting in a decadent (what looked to be gold plated) cat dish, sitting next to an equally as ostentatious cat bowl filled with what looked to be incredibly fresh and expensive meat. It looked better than half the shit Cisco ate!

And Wanda was gladly chowing down.

On the table was another box, this time a fair bit larger and heavier and an envelope of the same size with the same beautiful script.

Feeling a fair bit more confident and comfortable than he did last time, he snatched up the note and opened it.

 

_Hot Stuff,_

_I must admit, I was jealous when I found out I wasn’t the most important girl in your life, but I now know why._

_Honestly, she stole my heart, too._

_Please, let my future step-daughter enjoy her meal. I prepared it myself with only the freshest cuts of beef! Also, I hope you can enjoy these Daddy-Daughter items. I have to take care of my little girl and her dad._

_~Lisa_

_xoxo_

 

 

If Cisco was grinning ear to ear at the note he just read… Well, that was between him and his nearly empty apartment. And his chubby cat lounged on the kitchen floor in front of her brand new bowls of goodies.

This time he opened the gifts with a fair bit more gusto, shock filling him (but no where near as much as he felt when being met with millions of dollars in comics). At the top of the pile of gifts sat a beautiful gold woven collar that looked to have diamonds in it. Cisco could only hope they were fake, but, knowing how flashy Lisa was, they were definitely real. And definitely valuable. With Wanda’s name woven into it in a beautiful cursive.

Underneath the new collar was a small collection of cat toys and a few small articles of clothing with geeky pop culture references on them. He could feel his face heating up at the amount of thought that went into selecting and finding these items. At the bottom of the box was a bag of the top of the line cat food that was worth nearly a hundred dollars a bag. It was definitely more than enough to last her for the month.

 

* * *

 

 

When Barry walked in from his nighttime Flash patrol, a small grin left on his face (most likely from running into his favorite attractive, pun making villain), he noticed the new water and food dish sitting on the floor of the kitchen. Definitely a lot fancier than he remembered it looking.

And when he walked into his room and found Wanda asleep in his bed (again), he noticed the extremely expensive collar around her neck and the little shirt she had on that said “Schrodinger’s Troublemaker” on it.

“Ciscoooo!” he yelled.

“What up, Barry?” he asked, walking down the hall toward Barry’s room, immediately freezing in the doorway when he realized Barry was staring at his cat. Wearing her new clothes. And her expensive collar. That Cisco could never afford. In his life.

“I… I can explain...” he began, scratching the back of his head nervously as he prepared to bolt out the door.

Barry just grinned at him and winked, already completely aware as to what was unfolding between Cisco and the younger Snart. It seemed he was on board with it.

“Cisco, you dog! When are you bringing Lisa home for dinner?”

He just groaned. As was becoming a common occurrence around here.

 

* * *

 

It continued like this for over a month. Every few days, Cisco would return home from the lab and be met with new items from the gold loving thief. He tried convincing himself that it was just really cool how she was giving him all this stuff he never knew he wanted, but he quickly began realizing that he didn’t care about any of the items he received. The part he looked forward to most after a long day at work was the moment he would tear open each envelope and get to see that perfect script, writing out some kind of slightly snarky and touching note to the engineer.

She truly put a lot of thought into the gifts, and he was grateful.

He never had anyone go to the extremes that she has for his affections. She attended a few exclusive technology based conventions and bought prototypes of several models he had shown an interest in over the last few weeks, things he didn’t know how she obtained. Well, he did. But he didn’t want to think about that. Fun shirts, cute hats, a three piece suit that she would just “eat you [Cisco] alive in, you [Cisco] scrumptious geek”, and even some new video games, asking if he would want to play co-op sometime.

But none of that was important at all.

How was he ever going to repay her for all that she had done? He didn’t have the money she did (because he made an honest living) and he couldn’t afford the jewels he knew she would love. He contemplated asking Barry to talk to his (almost) boyfriend and get his input. If only he wasn’t absolutely terrified of Cold and the gun that Cisco had built.

 

Really, the gun didn’t even phase him.

Cold was _cold_. He was terrifying. He had no idea how Barry could talk about the man like he was some puppy that Barry wanted to adopt. Sure, from the looks of his and the Flash’s encounters, he would shoot the gun a millimeter too far and miss hitting Barry, or, if he did hit Barry, it would be a nonfatal hit. Everyone was well aware of how good a shot the older Snart was. There was no denying he had a soft spot for Barry.

But that didn’t mean he wouldn’t ice Cisco on the spot, especially if the younger man may or may not have had an interest in romantically seeing Female Inmate. Sister Cold.

 

Fuck.

 

Lisa.

 

He was interested in Lisa.

 

She had even taken to sending him text messages almost everyday. Sometimes sending pictures of her and her brother pulling heists, pictures that Cold would forward to Barry through her phone (typically with some kind of ice/cold pun and would be wearing a seductive smirk and wink in every single one, only Barry was too stupid to realize that Cold was putting on a show for him), taunting him jovially. She would send memes, jokes, anything she possibly could to try and break the ice between her and Cisco.

He hated that it absolutely worked. She didn’t even have to try, not really. It just seemed he was putting off the inevitable. It’s quite possible that he may have wanted to date her since the moment he met her in that bar. And even after he found out who she really was.

But it was really cemented when she came to him and asked for their help with those big, wide eyes full of terror helplessness. She looked so lost and frightened, having lost contact with her brother. Cisco’s heart hurt for her and he knew he wanted to do anything he possibly could to help this woman.

Somewhere along the way, it grew into more than just wanting to help her.

And when she kissed him?

His toes curled in his sneakers and his heart swooned.

Never in his life had a woman been capable of engaging that kind of reaction from him. But he kept putting off asking her to out because he was afraid. Not of her, not really. But of rejection. Or that this was just a passing infatuation she had with him because he saved her life.

But he finally decided to take the plunge and see where it led him.

 

* * *

 

 

Working his magic with Felicity, he managed to triangulate a semi-frequent position on Lisa, and it was only a few blocks from his and Barry’s apartment. Willing his courage not to falter, he scooped up the small box and the card he had written in his messy scrawl, and set out to find one of Lisa’s safehouses, hoping that Cold and Rory were definitely not there. He could do without some maiming. That would be more than awesome.

The closer he got to the building, the more his heart began hammering in his chest. Luckily, the building looked to be an abandoned warehouse, just on the edge of the city limits. He made quick work of sneaking through a window on the far side of the building, shock hitting him full force when he took in the sight of four sets of eyes snapping to his face.

Shit.

He forgot his goggles.

And he was in a building with four rogues.

Only one of which was Lisa.

And oh, joy. Mark Mardon was on the other side of the room, shock and confusion on his face while Mick Rory was next to him, hand immediately removing the heat gun from the holster on his thigh at the sudden disruption, only dropping his aim when he realized who entered the building, a slight chuckle heard under his breath.

Cold just sat back in his chair at the table of their makeshift board room, feet propped up and a smirk on his stupid face.

“Cisco. Cisco, Cisco, Cisco. To what do I owe the pleasure of your company. Is the Flash in need of a little stress relief?” he asked, cocking an eyebrow with his lewd question.

For a moment, this snapped Cisco out of his daze.

“First of all, my home boy is not a piece of meat, so I’d appreciate you not talking about him like that. Second, if you treated him with the respect he deserved, he would probably throw himself at you the first chance he gets...” his eyes grew wide as Cold’s smirk grew into a small smile, enjoying the fear on the young man’s face coupled with the new knowledge about his favorite scarlet clad speedster.

“Oh shit. Did I just say that to you? Oh shit.”

 

He’s dead.

 

So dead.

 

Dead on so many counts.

 

His tombstone will read:

Fucked with Captain Cold almost as much as Barry fucked with the timeline.

Oh, and managed to slightly let slip that his best friend had the hots for the enemy, much like he did for the enemy’s sister

 

 

Can you get that many letters on a tombstone? How big would it have to be? Would there even be a point in having one if he was turned into an ice sculpture with gilded accents that sat proudly in whatever safe house the Snarts decided to put him in?

_Bye Barry. You can have my comic book collection. But please avenge me. Your scary (not) boyfriend is going to tear me apart or make me into a new conversation piece. I’m really sorry that you had to find me this way, assuming you find me at all. Tell Wanda I died a war hero. She doesn’t need to know that her dad was a stupid loser who antagonized the leader of the Rogues._

 

Just as Len was about to speak, Lisa piped up, stalking up to Cisco with a predatory look in her eye.

“Lenny, leave my Cisco alone. I’m the only one allowed to tease him,” she said, looking over her shoulder at her brother who just snorted and went back to talking to his partner and Mardon. Who continued staring Cisco down. Like, really man. It was giving him the creeps. Then she took in the terrified look on his face, “Or scare him.”

“Hello, Cisco,” she purred into his ear, leaning into his personal space as much as she could without touching him. He was quite proud of himself for not backing up in fear, choosing instead to stand his ground.

She herded him through a door and into a more secluded part of the building to where they set up their sleeping quarters, ushering him to a comfy couch in the corner of the room near a soft lamp and an electric heater.

“Would you like some coffee?” she asked, bypassing the empty seat on the couch next to Cisco and heading over to the coffee pot on the small table in the corner, pouring herself a cup and one for Cisco at his slight nod, putting a few teaspoons of sugar and cream in each one.

When she was finally seated next to Cisco and they had a few moments of silence to sip on their coffee, she finally spoke.

“Not that I’m complaining, Cutie, but why are you here? And how did you find me?” she asked, feeling a little nervous at the ability Cisco had to find her. Maybe it was hypocritical because she constantly broke into his apartment and left gifts for him and a few things for Barry so he could get his ass into gear and start seeing her brother (seriously, how slow could the fastest man alive possibly be? Len wouldn’t wait around forever).

But it was concerning because of the life she led and how important it was for people to not be able to find her unless she wanted to be found.

“Honestly? It took me quite a while to finally get a ping on you. I had to recruit the help of one of my friends in Star City just to be able to find this place. I was going to leave this for you,” he said, reaching into his jacket pocket and removing the small box and the card he had, only slightly crinkled from climbing through the window and cowering for fear at the realization he fucked up by entering this warehouse.

Her eyes zeroed in on the small box in his hands, confusion on her face.

Slowly, he inched forward and slid the card and the box into her small, shaking hands. She seemed incredibly nervous, almost as nervous as when they had to remove an explosive out of her neck with the slightly likely chance of it detonating.

“You can go ahead and open them. If I can be honest, it makes me nervous because I really did just intend to leave them for you and I don’t do well in situations where I potentially embarrass mys-”

He was cut off by her surging forward and placing a tentative, delicate hand on his cheek, tilting his face toward her and gently meeting his lips with her own. It was no where near what he was expecting. After their last kiss, he honestly assumed anything further would be aggressive and animalistic (if her personality was anything to go by), so this was a pleasant surprise.

It was light and sweet and comfortable. Slightly timid and nervous. But no more timid and nervous than he had felt when he came in and saw her. The light of the afternoon shining through a stray window in the warehouse and giving her a slightly angelic glow. And that very same light shone on her older brother who looked like the devil incarnate (come on, what the fuck, Barry? This guy?) and his partner with a sinister gleam in his eye.

When she pulled away, she seemed a little more sure of herself. It was definitely coaxed along by Cisco’s hand resting lightly on her elbow, afraid to venture further in either direction, not wanting break the spell that had been cast over them.

Taking a breath, she broke the wax seal on the envelope. A wax seal she had to roll her eyes at. Because of course. Cisco would use the Hogwarts seal. Lisa chuckled as she slid the stationary out, eyes quickly roaming over the messy print scribbled down, giggling as she read the part at the beginning where he kept starting his note and marking it out.

 

~~_Female Inmate_ ~~

~~_Sister Cold_ ~~

~~_Golden Glider_ ~~

_Lisa,_

_I’m not the best with words, as I tend to ramble on and on and talk about several things that bore most people, but I will try._

_The last two months have been some of the best in my life. And not because of all the stuff you’ve given me and Wanda, but because of the effort you’ve put into reaching out to me._

_Receiving your handwritten letters and text messages quickly became the highlight of each day. And today, I would like to return the favor by requesting you join me for dinner this Friday. I made reservations for Cantino’s. Along with a few other things I have planned, if you’ll go, of course._

_Also, please take this. And quit breaking into my and Barry’s apartment._

_~Cisco_

 

She slowly opened the box, wondering what was in it.

Her breath caught in her throat as a stray tear rolled down her cheek, quickly getting wiped up by the soft pad of Cisco’s left thumb. Tossing the note and box aside, she launched herself at Cisco, burying her face into his chest, arms wrapped firmly around his middle. He felt awkward for a moment, not used to beautiful women literally throwing themselves at him, when he slowly eased his arms around her and rubbed soothing circles on her back.

 

On the floor was the box that contained a key to his and Barry’s apartment.

 

“I would love to have dinner with you!” she whispered into his chest, mostly muffled by his shirt, but he understood nonetheless.

“I’m glad, Lisa. You also missed a small piece of information on the back of the card.”

 

She slowly pulled away and shot him a confused look as he snatched up the card and handed it to her.

She may or may not have cried and thrown herself back into Cisco’s arms after that.

 

_P.S._

_Wanda loves her mom._

**Author's Note:**

> I felt like an idiot writing the tidbit about the comic books. I collect them and one day aspire to own Showcase #8 (1st appearance of Captain Cold) which will never happen because of how expensive it is. Instead of the actual CGC (which I do not own nor claim any rights to, obviously) I made it the CBC (Comic Book Company, haha) and tried to make off the wall attempts at the world's most famous DC comics. It was so cringey. But I loved every minute of it.


End file.
